Sunday 3 February 2019

I've always struggled with my identity.. who am I? I know who I am, and what I like, but the confusing factor is how the media and society categorises things, people, and various other things too. People are presumptuous, so if someone is covered in tattoos "surely they don't have a soft and girly side, they must be all rock 'n roll and cigarettes", and if somebody dresses girly 24/7 "surely they're stupid and naive"....

I'm a paradox – I'm intelligent, I'm covered in tattoos, I'm curvy/chubby, I work out regularly, I wear girly clothes, I like to be glamorous, I like country music, I've never smoked, I rarely drink, I'm spiritual, and I want a good career. Technically speaking, none of those things 'go together' according to society. But they do go together... because I'm living proof.

I can remember before I got tattoos – I had always wanted tattoos, but was too worried. "What if I can't be the editor of Vogue?", "What if people don't take me seriously?", "What if having tattoos won't match my style/clothes?"... but all of these questions were planted in my head because of society and the media. People automatically think that if you've got tattoos you're reckless, but this is so far from the truth. For me tattoos are a part of my own identity, they set me apart, they express my personality, and they complete me and my appearance. The gorgeous floral illustrations on my arms won't stop me from getting a decent job, nor do they prevent me from wearing clothes I want, and nor do they make me conform to society's ideal of what a tattooed girl should be like. I'm my own person!

Finding your own identity, and your own 'happy medium' of a fusion of styles, personas, and lifestyles is difficult. But once you have found your own identity, it's so rewarding. Don't feel like because you want to get tattoos that you have to be reckless. Don't feel like because you dress like a girly girl that you need to act dumb. And don't feel like because you don't conform to a certain way, that you can't act that way – so what if you're not dressed like a business woman but you're a CEO, and so what if you don't want to have any tattoos but you're a tattoo artist.

People presume, and that's life. People will never, ever stop presuming things, so why on earth should we try to fit into a specific box in order to live our lives. Be who you want, do what you want, wear what you want, and have the lifestyle that you desire (providing it's not harming you or somebody else).

Be the most amazing paradox you can – who cares if you confuse people... you don't need to explain yourself to them, you just need to be happy with you.

You can like romance novels, yet have never been in love. You can wear pink, yet identify as a boy. You can wear blue, yet identify as a girl. You can be glamorous, yet still like DIY. You can be blonde and girly, yet be the most intelligent person in the room. You can be curvaceous/chubby yet still be healthier than the slimmest girl you know. You can be young, but hate all of the things that stereotypically young people do. You can be old and act younger than young people. There are so many variations of being a paradox, you just need to be true to yourself, and you'll eventually realise that it's beautiful to be a paradox... because it's beautiful to be YOU! 

Are you a paradox? Do you feel that you're a fusion of many things, personas, and styles? Being a paradox is beautiful, and definitely something you shouldn't shy away from. Embrace yourself as the paradox that you are, and own it!


  1. Oh, I think I am also paradox in many respects!
    xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena


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